Agree re: Gawyn. I don't think his moral code was gray. His goals are all pretty solidly "good" guys goals. Protect Egwene, protect Morgase (avenge Morgase when he thinks she's dead), fight the shadow, protect Andor. His methods don't usually INTEND to put anyone else in danger except himself...
He can be a victim and not be perfect himself. I admit I see worse consent violators than Mat, but I definitely think there's a case to be made that he stops at "no" rather than asking first. Alora, your second quote pretty much says that - "any woman who let him know she did not want to be...
I think the most morally gray thing that Moiraine does is the way she hands Lan's bond off to Myrelle. The bond is like sex. When it's consensual it's wholesome and life affirming, but when it's nonconsensual it's awful and a violation. Both Moiraine and Elayne use bonding to save someone's life...